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In my opinion, Northerners have to be the most intelligent group in the country. I seriously think the north possesses the highest number of people with the highest IQ in Nigeria. And I wouldn’t have learned this if I didn’t serve as a Corp member in the popular and always well-funded and lucrative NYSC program. This is how I know…

So…One day in NYSC camp, this northern guy walked up to me and asked if he could borrow my phone.

“I need to call my doctor, he said”.

Is he sick? I asked. No, I’m the one who’s sick, he replied.

That makes sense, I replied back.

Well, he took my phone, and guess what? Wait for it——–he dialed his doctor’s number offhand!!! Whaaaaaarrrrrrrrt?

See, I don’t think I would have my doctor’s number memorized if I had cancer. My doctor would probably be the one calling like this:

“Who is this?”

“This is your doctor,” you were supposed to have surgery yesterday, “oh wow, you’re still alive?”

The guy from the north dialed his doctor’s number offhand. And yes of course, he got the wrong number, and then he just kept calling the same guy to see if he would become his doctor. Poor guy.

The guy from the north had just gotten to the camp and had the prescription for his medications mixed up. If he hadn’t gotten through to his doctor that day, he could have died. 

And at that point, it hit me!

This is why some northerners frequently call the wrong numbers; because the average northerner would rather die than keep a phonebook. Only people with high IQ would pull a stunt like that. Right?

Well, Moses could have died that day, but he would have died knowing he stood firm to his belief of the northern phone culture. A true king! From the north.

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